The 2nd Annual Scabbies!

Mark Wahlberg, The Happening: Andy Samberg's impression on Saturday Night Live gives him too much credit.

(Tie) Jessica Alba, The Eye: She's old enough to stop acting like she's auditioning for a high school play.

Shannon Sossamon, One Missed Call: Perpetually dazed and confused, she's like Lisa Bonet on cough syrup.

Uwe Boll, Seed: Just because.

Prom Night: Shallow characters, flaccid action, cliched scares and bloodless violence. The only entertainment value is ironic.

Untraceable: I haven't seen a villain this geeky and nonthreatening since Bill Gates.

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor: I didn't think the increasingly video game-like franchise could dip any lower than The Mummy Returns, but abominable snowmen will do it.

One Missed Call: If Ed Burns and Shannon Sossamon are the best stars you can get, maybe you should consider the direct-to-video route.

Feast 2: Sloppy Seconds: Hopes were high after the fun first film, but Feast 2 feels rushed and even cheaper than the original, playing like a Troma feature crossed with a Howard Stern skit, with men in rubber suits, copious bodily fluids and tasteless gags involving dead babies and dwarves.

Runner-Up: Shrooms: With its polished look, intriguing storyline and mix of mystical and real-life terror, it had potential, but the final product is drab and uneventful.

Joy Ride 2: Dead Ahead: This sequel takes what was an enjoyable cat-and-mouse thriller and turns it into an excuse for generic torture porn, as villainous truck driver Rusty Nail kidnaps the boyfriend of the protagonist and tortures him while simultaneously forcing her into torturous situations for his viewing pleasure. Two tortures for the price of one!

Mirrors: Surprisingly shallow and dunderheaded, given the talent involved. Et tu, Jack Bauer?